Estrogen-crazed! - Molly

Progesterone has been added to my repertoire. Three times a day I have to "insert" 100mg of progesterone into, well you can guess where. (and if you are not sure, look at the picture more closely)

So far, so good. My levels are where they want them to be. Transfer is scheduled for Monday at NOON! I will check in at 10:15 am for blood work and then acupuncture. Transfer at 12pm followed by another round of acupuncture.

They will be giving me a Valium so looks like Jason will be driving home.

Side effects? The progesterone hasn't started to bother me yet. I do notice a bit of water weight, but nothing that is too bad. I am sure by the 8th week (fingers crossed!), it will.

The estrogen, well that's another story. I did an estradiol test (blood test for estrogen) on Tuesday. It was supposed to be around 300 and it came in at 94. Yikes, not good. So they called in a prescription for Estrace (estrogen in a pill form). 

Between the patches (still on 4) and now the pills, I'm in rare form. A LOT OF ESTROGEN IS PUMPING THROUGH MY BODY.

Side effects? I thought I was home free, but between yesterday and today, I have been a total B.

I'm just on edge. I can feel it build up inside of me and I don't know why or what it really is. Once it starts, it just keeps building. I don't freak out or anything, but I am edgy, even mean and my poor husband is taking the brunt of it.

I don't know if it's the drugs...or if it's me. I am hoping that it's the drugs and that it passes soon.

Until then......I'm sorry.

And then there were.....

FOUR!

i got creative today with them

 Up to four estrogen patches and this is where I will stay every other day until we transfer on

MONDAY, APRIL 2nd!

I start my progesterone, Medrol and Tetracycline tomorrow. The Medrol and Tetracycline are antibiotics I will take for the next four days. The progesterone I will insert 3 times daily from tomorrow until they start to wean me off around 11-12 weeks along (assuming a pregnancy occurs). 

I am so excited. We are so excited. 

CHALLENGE: To all my readers out there, I am posting this challenge to you. Here is the back story:

When Jason and I did our IUI's (insemination), when the nurse left us alone we played a song to my belly (future baby of course). I got the idea from a dear friend and now they song they played is their baby's favorite tune. 

Over the course of the 5 IUI's we have played: 

Better Together - Jack Johnson

Have A Little Faith In Me - Michael Franti

The Three of Us - Ben Harper

and

Hold Us Together - Matt Maher (if you haven't heard this one, download it - it's amazing)

We love each and every one of these songs. They always bring tears to my eyes. But it is time for something different. 

So we challenge ALL OF YOU: Help us find a song for our transfer. 

Please leave it in the comment box or send me an email at stillnotpregnant@gmail.com

We have a few songs in mind, but we would love options. The sooner the better, so we can listen and learn to love it. In the end, all song suggestions will be made into a Baby Reynolds (or Babies) CD for our kid(s) to always enjoy and to help us always remember this journey and those who supported us all along the way. 

On Monday, after the transfer, I will let you all know which song we used. 

Thank you for helping make this journey so much more special.

 

They say it takes a village - Molly

As many of you of know, our transfer date is steadily approaching. As of now, it is set for Monday, April 2nd. Not sure if it's an AM or PM type of procedure, I will know more after my appointment on Tuesday the 27th.

Jason and I would like to ask our families, friends, co-workers, readers, acquaintances, really anyone who can and wants to take the time to include us in your prayers and fast on this upcoming Fast Sunday.

What's Fast Sunday? As part of our faith, every first Sunday of the month our church has asked us to fast or skip at least 2 meals (food and drink). We fast to help us or others overcome trials and tribulations, to bring us closer to our Savior and to help us gain more understanding of the plan that Heavenly Father has for us.

We are so very blessed to have been given this opportunity to bring (hopefully) a baby into this world. We know that our Heavenly Father has led us to our doctors, helped provide us with the proper insurance and has granted us patience and hope during this process.

We will be fasting on Sunday to help us prepare for our transfer. We hope that you will join us. If fasting isn't your favorite thing to do, then we would really appreciate any and all prayers as we get closer to our transfer. Whether you are vocal or silent, within a faith or without; any positive words, intentions (on and off your mat) or energy directed towards us and this occasion would mean so much.

Jason and I are also approaching the 3 year anniversary of our son Jack J Reynolds. We lost him on April 5th, 2009 at 16 weeks. This has been a long process for us. We have made so much progress, had many setbacks and have learned so much about ourselves and what is truly important since then. It's hard to imagine that I could have had an almost 3 year old, or an almost 2 year old or an almost 1 year old right now. And there are many days when I am so unsure of the plan that my Heavenly Father has for me, but here I am, here we are, about to embark on something so remarkable. I almost can't imagine it being any other way, without any of you on this journey with us.

So this Sunday, if you could take some time out of your day, maybe skip a meal or two, light a candle, direct your intentions, thoughts and prayers towards us and our journey to become parents...

we would really appreciate it.

Jack J Reynolds 12 weeks

 

Uno Mas - Molly

three little piggies all in a row

TRES PATCHES!

No real noticeable side effects yet. 

My husband is out of town, so that probably is a good thing (just in case).

We are getting closer!

Patch Upate - Molly

you can see where my old patches were - I'm running out of places!

 

I'm now up to TWO patches!

Doctor called me yesterday to let me know that my estrogen levels are right where they should be. I am going to continue on my calendar. Next appointment is Tuesday the 27th. They will measure my estrogen (more blood) and check the thickness of my lining (ultrasound). I have 2 acupuncture appointments already set up to make sure my lining gets nice and thick.

Side effects: bring on the hot flashes! I am really starting to notice that I get warmer quicker than I used to. The night sweats have gotten a bit better, I think because Jason keeps the house so darn cold at night. 

Spring is officially arriving in Denver, so I am trying to just be outside more. It is glorious! 

Have a great week!

Patchin' It Up! - Molly

Howdy Friends! Been a few days, I know. I've been on the road. And yes, it was for a dog show. Don't judge me.

The past few weeks have been relatively quiet for me. Lupron shot every morning. I am now down to 5 units a day. Side effects have been some pretty bad headaches (I feel for people who suffer migraines), some water retention and some night sweats. Otherwise I have been feeling pretty good.

On the 13th, I started estrogen patches. I wear them on my belly. I put a new one on every other day. I am still at 1 patch. But I will start increasing the day after tomorrow. I will get up to about 6 patches at once. I will patch up for a week and then get my estrogen tested on the 27th. Side effects have been minimal, but we shall see when I am fully patched up.

my lovely self portrait of my belly

Progesterone starts on the 28th as well as the Medrol and Tetracycline (antibiotics to prep for transfer). Woo hoo! Love me some progesterone inserts. Fun. Stuff.

I am still teaching. My schedule will shift on 4/1. I will have subs until the doctor says all is well, babies or no babies. Hopefully everything sticks the way it should and I can slowly work my way back into my daily routine (with adjustments of course). 

the magic calendar

I am continuing to feel positive about the process. I have recently read of others success with much different circumstances, so I am hopeful.

It is all becoming so real though. Two more weeks and then I will have my babies inside me. Three more weeks and our lives could change forever.

I have complained of the length of this process, several times. But now it really does seem like a small piece, a short moment. 

Gosh, I hope and pray this works.

Are you feeling lucky today?! Haylee

Just stopping by to wish you all a fun, luck filled weekend!!! 

I spoke with one of our IVF nurses today and we are set to transfer in September.  This means we start to prep in July!  Whoot!

In the meantime, who knows-  maybe we will get pregnant on our own-  there are those stories. 

One thing I know for sure, the meds are gone.  Thank the Lord, my hooters have returned to normal (I know you were all on pins and needles waiting to hear- haha).  I am enjoying the amazing weather in Denver, spending time with my husband, fur kids and friends and honestly not feeling any sense of worry or stress.  

Our "luck", it is changing...... 

Could it be? - Molly

what's left of my Costco box of tampons

Could it be? The Ol' 96er is almost empty? 

Woo hoo! 

Yes, my Day 1 has started. And it just hit me. 

This COULD be my last Day 1 for a while - if all goes well. Oh, that seems like music to my ears.

I am still on my Lupron shots of 10 units a day. On Wednesday, I lessen the dose to 5 units a day, but I add in my estrogen patches. I am glad the patches go on my belly, wouldn't want people thinking I'm a smoker. :)

I leave for Texas on Tuesday. A little road trip with a good friend and our dogs. I'll have appointments lined up for when I get back. Those results will give us a better idea of the ACTUAL Transfer Date. It is still set for April 2nd.

Until then, I am in really good spirits. For the first time in a long, I am okay with the lack of control. It is what it is. And it will be what it will be.

We have done everything we can do. 

And I am okay with that.

(no more Day 1's please, no more...)

Every entry must have an exit... Haylee

Hey everyone!  Hope this post finds you doing well and enjoying some beautiful weather like we are in Denver! 

For me, I have found some space to relax with the results of our egg retrieval & grasp the fact I have an egg quality issue (at least we now know what has been going on all this time & what we may have to deal with in the future). 

I am back to my normal activities & this makes me so happy.  However, I am not enjoying the exit route I believe all the hormones are taking out of my body.  This may be TMI, but really our whole blog could be considered TMI at this point- haha.  The exit route the hormones have chose in my body is my nipples (PS, I can't stand the word nipples, I have no idea why).  My boobs hurt more than I can describe.  My nipples don't hurt, so this is why I think the hormones are choosing them as the escape route.  I can't sleep on my side, my belly or my back.  So here I am again back to not getting the sleep I need.  My hooters are toppling out of all my yoga tops and they literally hurt most of the time right now.  It is crazy frustrating, but I am sure it will get better soon.

Wednesday was my day one and Molly was not kidding in her "Wicked" post about the first cycle after egg retrieval surgery.  Dr. Surrey (who did my egg retrieval) did warn me of this, but I was pretty much out of it when he did and laughed it off.  Well, this is no laughing matter.  One thing for sure Molly and I can share with side effects from this process is the "wicked".  Blek! 

It is really cool to see the differences in what each persons body goes through with the same medications.  This is why both Molly and I want to get it out on the blog.  As much information as possible- in the hopes it can help someone else if they have any of the side effects we have had throughout this process.

We also met with Dr. M on Wednesday and talked to her about waiting until the end of summer for our transfer.  I want all these hormones out.  I want more acupuncture & call me selfish, but I want some time.  We have been with Dr. M for 2.5 years now.  When I think about it I am still a little dazed at how quickly the time passes (but trust me sometimes the time feels like it is lurking on).  However, look how far we have come.  The light at the end of the tunnel couldn't be brighter and when we are ready I will be so excited to transfer 2 of our little embryos back into my body. 

The battle is still not over, but the future looks more promising on the baby side then I have ever seen it. 

Have a wonderful weekend friends!  And for those of you with babies, even if they are being naughty, hug them tightly and be so grateful for this gift of being a parent.

Friday Fun Day - Molly

I've said it before and I'll say it again - NO MORE BCP!

It's a beautiful day here in Denver. 60 degrees, but it really feels like 70 because there is barely any wind. I just spent the last 3 hours outside with Penny at the park.

Perfect.

You know what also makes this day perfect?

NO MORE BIRTH CONTROL! 

My last pill was this morning. 

Now I have an awesome period to look forward too.

That only means one thing though -

we are ONE step closer to Transfer Day!

Not by the hair of my chinny, chin chin - Molly

Ok, I am starting to get a little annoyed with all of the hormones I am on. 

I can handle hot flashes or night sweats.

Indigestion and constipation don't get me down.

Break-through bleeding or bruises on the belly are really no big deal.

But I am getting tired of.....

THE CHIN HAIRS!

I'll admit that before all of the hormones, I did have one or two hairs that would grow on the right side of my chin. One or two - that's normal. And I am a little obsessive about making sure I keep them plucked.

But since doing all of the IUI and now the IVF cycle - my hormones are a little out of whack.

And now I feel like there is a little black FOREST growing on the right side of my chin. Each hair is thick, bristly, black (sometimes white - odd, I know) and it is becoming impossible to keep up with them all.

I have asked my laser hair removal people about them and they say nothing can be done until AFTER pregnancies, breast-feeding etc. Oh, and the white ones - can't be helped at all.

UGH!!!

I hate feeling like a billy goat.

It's Been Awhile - Molly

Hey Friends! It's been too long! Hope everyone has had a wonderful weekend. We sure did. We hit up Breckenridge and Leadville for some good snow. Jason had a blast in the deep powder and I enjoyed my time with Penny at the parks.

I started my Lupron today. 10 units. It's a small thin needle, but it packs a punch. Still on the birth control, my last day will be on the 9th. YAY! My estrogen patches and progesterone inserts (yuck) are in the mail. I start those on the 14th.

We also bought a juicer! A Breville, and it has LOTS of parts. I am excited to just have more access to healthy fruits and veggies, especially for the summer. IF we get pregnant, then juicing will be a great addition to my diet.

Sorry more isn't happening right now. Stay tuned though. It will get interesting. Just wait til you see me patch up!

our new juicer! now i just have to figure it out!

Day 1, 2, 3 & "3"- the results.... Haylee

Monday morning, 2/27- 
Out of the 13 eggs that were retrieved during surgery, only 2 of the eggs were mature.  Those eggs were put into the "free swim" (IVF) petry dish with some of Joe's super hero's.  Those 2 eggs were fertilized as of this morning- we have 2 embryos.   

There were 2 other eggs that had just made it to a mature enough size this morning to undergo ICSI (they take the sperm and literally inject it into the egg to fertilize).

2 eggs fertilized?  That is it?  Not to sound like a brat.  But we were hoping for more MATURE eggs.  So many thoughts & concerns running though my mind right now.  Don't get me wrong, 2 fertilized eggs are way better than none.

Monday night, Dr. M called to clarify what happened.  Never in her wildest dreams did she think we would only come out with 2 mature eggs.  She thought worst case it was a fertilization issue with us.  Everything about our IVF process (and all our IUI's) were text book perfect- meds, responses, hormone levels, measurements, etc.  However, what is happening is the follicles and everything around them are developing the way they should, but my eggs are not maturing at the rate they should be.  This means there is an egg quality issue.  My girly parts just aren't working right- or together for that matter of fact. 

Like I said, this not only threw us for a loop, but her as well.  She said it is very rare this happens in a healthy person at my age (this is typically something she would see in a 40+ year old woman).  We will freeze our 2 embryos on Wednesday (Day 3), it is too much of a risk to take them to day 5 blastocyst.  She also thinks they will survive better inside of me.   It is of her professional opinion when we decide to transfer, we transfer them both to up our chances of having a baby.  It is still to be determined what happens with the ICSI dish- but it doesn't look likely they will be viable embryos to transfer.  Time will tell.

Right now I do not feel good.  I feel defeated.  I have so many emotions still going through my mind even though Dr. M's call totally helped.  This is just so hard.  This journey HAS NOT been easy at all for us.  Nothing about the surgeries I have been through, meds or anything has been easy on my body or mind. 

Tuesday morning, 2/28- 
Great news from the embryologist.  They were able to ICSI 3 eggs and 2 fertilized!  We now have 4 embryos.  They will call tomorrow to discuss the quality of the embryos. 

Fingers, toes and lots of prayers the quality of these 2 new embryos are good enough to also freeze!!  This would give us 2 chances of becoming pregnant now that we know we will have to transfer 2 at a time!  Woo hoo.  Come on ICSI embryos, grow, grow!

Wednesday afternoon 2/29-
Our 2 "free swim" embryos were safely frozen today on their day 3.  They have 8 cells and one is perfect quality, the other is middle grade.  They will call tomorrow afternoon with the embryo quality of the ICSI twins (this will be their day 3 since they fertilized later).  Still praying they will be strong and viable enough to freeze. 

Thursday afternoon 3/1-
Our 2 ICSI embryo twins were froze today (today is their day 3).  One was great quailty the other not so good, but they decided to freeze that little one too in hopes it will be able to grow in my body if we need to use it.

So here is what we have 4 embryos:  1 is a 4 grade (this is awesome quality), 2 are a 4- grade (this is really good) and 1 is a 3 grade which is not that great.

I am thankful our first transfer looks like it will be strong, even with a day 3 freeze.  For now I will rest, get my body back (get the hormones out), have a little fun, work and hopefully get back to yoga & snowboarding! 

So much gratitude and love to you all for the prayers, support and for reading.  My cup runneth over. 

4 embryos- NOT MINE- safe and sound in the freezer- all frozen individually -I love them already....