Tuesday, February 9, 2016

It Is Worth It

Well, we have survived the first week! 
Only about 932 or so more to go. 

Their personalities are really starting to bloom.



Bo is chill.
My niece calls him Mr. Chill.
Nothing really gets to him unless it's a wet diaper or it's time to eat.

He lays around like a log most of the time just happy to be held.
He is starting to fill out and his bulldog cheeks are reminiscent of Jason's.

He is a good eater, but not so much a good burper - he falls asleep most of the time.
He will not stand for a wet diaper, so we are grateful for the blue line indicator.

He loves his bath.
He loves music.
He loves to be rubbed, touched, tickled.
My mother (his Nonna) has been spoiling him.

He looks handsome in blue.
And his hair is lightening up.
His skin tone is much more comparable to Jason's.
He's already peed on his Daddy twice (or maybe more).







Nicknames have been Mr. Bo, Little Bo, Mr. B, BoBo (not my fav), the Prince and sweet boy.

He is a sweet boy. 
I see him growing up to be extremely gentle and in tune to other people's feelings.
I see him being thoughtful and purposeful in the things he does.
I see him being tender and letting his little sister have whatever she wants.




Our sweet Annie.
Miss Pill, as my niece proclaimed.
She will tell you when she is unhappy.
She is very vocal and very binky driven.

She is so tiny.
Her face and features are so much more feminine and soft.
She is incredibly expressive and has us laughing with the faces she can make.

Her appetite is growing everyday and she has become a champion burper.
She is not as fond of her baths, but not because of the water, she hates getting undressed (I think she gets cold fast).

She is delicate.
Fiesty.
And the noises she makes when eating are hilarious.
I am grateful I am NOT breastfeeding her because she knows how to tear up a nipple - like a ravenous dog, her Nonna says.  

She needs a bit more time to eat and burp.
She loves to pee while you change her diaper. 
(Resulting in a lot of diapers.)

Pink is her signature color.
Her skin tone is much more like mine.
Her hands resemble mine.
She doesn't mind bows in her hair -yet.
(Let's hope that continues.)

She also loves to be touched, rubbed and sung too.
She is very alert and spends more time awake than her brother.

Annie will be a tough girl.
She is be a fighter.
She will always want her voice to be heard.

She is inquisitive and observant.
She will be independent and have the ability to stand up for herself and others.

She will not fear the opinions of others.
She will definitely wrap her Daddy around her finger.
She knows how to steal hearts.




Nicknames are Sweet Annie, Pip (short for Pipsqueak), Pige (short of pigeon), the Princess, sweet girl and Little Ann.


My cup runneth over.


It is everything everyone said it would be and more.

It is hard.
Fun.
Beautiful.
Messy.
Exhausting.
Rewarding.

It requires immense teamwork.
Patience.
Quick thinking.
Ability to multi-task.

You really do give up yourself.

But oh man, is it worth it.

Every tear, heartbreak, struggle, hurt, pain, day, month, year.....

It was all worth it.

It IS all worth it.

Wednesday, February 3, 2016

Introducing....


Ashley Ann Reynolds
We are going to call her Annie, our sweet Annie.

Born January 29th, at 7:39am
 Shortly after her brother (within the same minute)
6lbs 6oz
19" long
 

Bo Smith Reynolds
But we like to call him Mr. Bo.

Slightly older (by seconds) and much larger.
6lbs 15 oz
19.5" long

Sorry for the gruesome photos but this was our first look. 

We probably looked like deer in headlights to the hospital staff, but we were lucky to be in the OR and snap these photos.


We are parents.
Real life parents.
To actual human children.
 

And they are perfect.

We are all just mesmerized by the experience.

Ashley was a hero all the way.
She is recovering well.



And the cousins are thrilled.
They are a big help with the babes.
They love to hold them and feed them, but not too keen on any diaper changes.
 



Grandparents are already in action.
Everyone can't believe how much Bo resembles the Reynolds side of the family and how Annie resembles more of my side (Smith).


Their hair is everything I hoped of and dreamed of. Dark, thick (Annie more than Bo) and crazy Asian (Bo more than Annie).



There were so many emotions that day.
I didn't bawl my eyes out like I had expected.
I think I was all cried out.
All I could feel was joy.
Peace.
Completeness.

They were here, healthy and strong.
Straight from Heaven and into our arms.

What a miracle.
Two miracles.

There was one moment that was the most tender of all.
One moment I had dreamed of and was hoping to capture.


These will be printed and will hang in the nursery.
I always want the babes to know that they were made by love, carried with love and given to us in love.

Thank you Ashley and Rob for making us a family.
 


Again, you can catch with us on the day by day on Instagram - mollyo11.

I will try to update soon.

But for now, I just want to hold them. 
I want to smell them.
I want to look at every feature and see the mini versions of ourselves.
I want to soak in all these feelings and enjoy every moment.
Even the not so fun ones.

They will disappear so fast. 
This phase will end and we will be into the next.

I look forward to each and every moment.
I can't wait to evolve. 

I feel myself slowly becoming a mother.
This feels more and more real with each passing day.

I am a mom.

Thursday, January 28, 2016

To My Love...



To My Love....

Tonight is the last night of it just being us. Tomorrow starts a new chapter where you will be Dad and I will be Mom. Tomorrow everything changes. We will change. But I am not afraid of losing you or of losing us. Tomorrow we will be better. Stronger. More rooted.

Tomorrow we will become a family.

Thank you for working so hard to give us everything.
Thank you for never giving up on us or our family.
Thank you for being there for me when I was unable to be who I wanted to be.
Thank you for taking care of me when I was hurting.
Thank you for allowing me to grieve, but also for making me stand up and move forward.
Thank you for remembering each of our angels and missing them each day.
Thank you for being a worthy priesthood holder so that you could give me blessings to heal and have faith.
Thank you for having faith when I was lacking.
Thank you for each and every prayer.
Thank you for every wonderful adventure around the world and working so hard so we could use all the points and miles on celebrating us.
Thank you for pushing me into Crossfit. Working out with you is one of my favorite things to do.
Thank you for supporting me in different aspects of my career and allowing me to be a "stay at home wife".
Thank you for finding Penny and adding her to our lives. She made me a mama first and will always be our baby.
Thank you for loving her as you would a child and caring for her.
Thank you for supporting all of the foster and rescue dogs I brought in, even when they would poop on the floor.
Thank you for letting Penny have countless sleepovers with her friends and even allowing them to snuggle in the bed.
Thank you for sitting through countless doctor appointments, the good ones and the bad ones.
Thank you for wanting to find a way to bring these babies to Earth and giving up any dreams of owning a Maserati.
Thank you for making our house a home.
Thank you for your testimony and belief in our eternal family.

Thank you for loving me. All of me. The fat me, the skinny me, the crying me, the angry me, the scared me, the doubtful me, the tired me, the frustrated me......ALL OF ME.

You are my everything. You are my #1. Without you nothing is possible and without is not where I want to be.

I can't wait to see you as a father. I can't wait for our children to know you and your endless love for them. I can't wait to tell them how much you wanted them and how hard you worked to get them here.

Here's to a new chapter.
A new adventure.

I love you more than you will ever know.

Thank you for everything.

Love,

Me


Thank you for

Wednesday, January 27, 2016

Will I Ever Be Able to Truly Say Thank You?


There are no gifts, no words, no surprises that can ever match what Ashley is doing for us.

My heart is so full that it wants to explode and I just don't know how to really handle and process it all.

So many people, from so many places, within our many communities - family, friends, people from church, the gym, the neighborhood, on social media, that we know, we come in brief contact with and even people we have never met - have all come together in prayer, in hope, belief, positive thoughts, energy, well wishes  - all for the love of these babies, Ashley and our journey.

That is a lot.

In a good way.

But it weighs on me.

Heavy.

Will I ever be able to truly say thank you?

No blog or Facebook post, no Instagram shot or Thank You card will ever completely capture how I am feeling on the inside. 

Most days just the thought of it all leaves me in tears (happy tears) because I know ALL of this HAS been possible because of SO many. It's a feeling that overflows in my heart and lightens my soul. It burns and keeps me warm. It pulls and reminds me that we have been blessed.


http://inservice.ascd.org/wp-content/uploads/2014/05/Maya-Angelou-Attitude-for-Gratitude-quote.jpg

But I worry.

I worry it isn't enough.

I worry that people will feel that I am UN-grateful or that now that I have want I want - I don't need anything or anyone else.

 I worry that my actions will be construed as ungrateful if I don't write back faster enough, text fast enough, post enough pictures, put the babes in the right outfits, use the gifts we've been given, allow them to be held. 

There is nothing I want more than to share these precious miracles with the world.
I am so excited to have these babies meet and know EACH person who took part in bringing them safely to Earth.

I want the babes to feel the deep love that so many already have for them.
I want to see their incredible journey and to know that they are special, that they are meant to be here.

That they have a purpose.

But I also want to close my doors and windows, turn off all connections to the social world and just hold them. 

 I want us to just be US for a while. 
Because each and every day, I am sure for a long time, I will look at them and be amazed that they truly are mine. That Heavenly Father heard every prayer and blessed Ashley with the strength to bring them to us. 

To be honest, I don't know how I am going to feel come Friday. I might be OVER-posting. You might have to block me. I might be so high on emotion that you will have to tell me to back off.

But just in case, if I do fade out for a bit, or delay posts, or don't respond quickly or even hide them away for a while...

please, please, PLEASE don't think for one minute it is because I am ungrateful.

I will be forever grateful.

I AM forever grateful. 

And the only way I know that I can truly show HOW grateful I am, is to be the best mother I can be.

PS: most likely? You won't be able to stop me from sharing every minute of every moment. I will break the internet. Kim Kardashian has nothing on me.

Monday, January 25, 2016

Waiting.....

This is the last week, last few days before the babies come. We are in the waiting game. Ashley is feeling great. Still working out. Still attending her meetings. Still being an awesome mom that plans birthday parties, baptisms and barbeques.

So now we wait.

My mother arrives on Wednesday. Jason finishes travel for work on Wednesday.

So we wait.

But we are having some fun while we wait.





















Because You Asked.....

Again, I apologize for not keeping the blog up as much as I originally hoped. If you want information a bit quicker, you can follow me on Instagram at mollyo11 - pics, info will go there first. I hope to update the blog as soon as I have a free hand.

Over the past few weeks my inbox has filled up with some questions, concerns etc. So I am going to use this blog post to answer them.

This is not your normal pregnancy. There are SO many unknowns. You will know as soon as I know and there are so many things I will not know until the moment I need to.

But because you asked......

1) Breastfeeding? 
I will not breastfeed. Yes, I know I could if I wanted. And as much as I appreciate everyone encouraging me, offering their services to me - I WILL NOT BE BREASTFEEDING. This was an easy decision to make. Once I knew I would not be carrying, I resigned to the fact that I will not have this experience.
Over the past 5 years I have put so many different things into my body. Natural, unnatural. I have NO desire to put any more in it. If I was having ONE baby, maybe I would consider it. MAYBE. But with TWO babies, NO. I will not breastfeed. Ashley is willing to pump while we are here and we will just do our best to give them the best for as long as we can. I also have been very blessed to have had SO many wonderful women donate their extra supply to me. I hope to use it. All of it. But most likely my babies will be formula fed.

2) Co-Sleeping? 
No. Again, not with TWO babies. Will they sleep in my room? MAYBE. But in a pack and play, rock and play, Mamaroo or the DockATot. Not in OUR BED. One reason? It scares me. Another? Our bed is Penny's bed. She needs HER space too.

3) Reusable diapers?
No. The cost is not substantial enough to be worth the effort. I don't want to do ANYMORE laundry. 

4) Fly or Drive?
Our original plan was to drive home with the babies after a few weeks, but after the drive earlier this month took us almost 3 days (and that was minus babies), we are toying with having my mother flying the babies back with me while he drives. Obviously, we have to see what the doctor says and how the babies health is. Is it ideal? No it's not. But this is not your average situation. Are there germs? Yes. I am having to learn to let go of some things and this is one of them. 

5) The birth. Vaginal? C-Section?
Here is THE PLAN. We will have a C-section on Friday, January 29th here is South Carolina at 730am. The boy is head down and the girl is still sideways. It was the best decision to just go ahead with a C-section so that the delivery can be swift and seamless. Jason and I hope to be in the room, but usually it is limited to ONE person and I want Ashley to have her husband by her side during surgery. I am happy to wait with Jason and have our babies brought to us, together. I don't feel that I will be missing out on something. Our experience will be different, it is different. I am going to look forward to the moments that we will have that others would not have.


All in all, I really appreciate all the kind thoughts, concerns, well wishes and advice. To be honest, I am a bit overwhelmed with it all because everything just depends......

There are so many unknown factors since I am not the one that is pregnant. We are not at home having these babies. So we just have to take things ONE STEP AT A TIME.

I have had a hard time relinquishing control. But I am slowly learning to LET GO and just see how things go. We need to see how healthy they are. We need to see if there will be NICU time or not. We need to do what is best for the babies. And for us.

Thank you for understanding.