Sunday Bloody Sunday - Molly

Here we go again.

First, let me say that I just returned from an ultrasound and the Bat is doing fine. Whew.

Let's start at the beginning.

While we were getting ready for church I noticed a little bit of red (more red than earlier) when I wiped. It made me nervous, so I put a pad on and kept an eye on things.

All seemed well. 

We came home from church and I put in a suppository and took a short nap. Again, all seemed well. 

I decided to get Penny out for a swim at a nearby lake, so we left about 3pm. 

While at the lake, I felt it. 

GUSH.

Since I had a pad on (and we were alone at the lake), I took a small peak in my panties.

BRIGHT, RED BLOOD and A LOT OF IT.

I rushed Penny to the car (poor girl was not ready to leave) and we started the 10 minuted drive home. 

I felt it again while driving.

GUSH. 

It was warm so I knew it wasn't from my suppository.

I got home and went into the bathroom. The pad was almost soaked with bright, red blood.

The tears started immediately. I rushed downstairs to Jason and told him we needed to go to the ER.

Here we go again.
I could see it all over his face.

As I walked upstairs, I felt something push out of me. 

I knew this feeling all too well. 

I yelled out to Jason.

"Something's coming out, it might be the baby."

I rushed back to the bathroom to discover a clot (about 2 quarters size) on the pad. 

There was a bit of relief, but it made me even more nervous.

This didn't look good. 

We got in the car and headed off to the ER. 

While in the car, I called the nurse on-call.

Luckily, it was my nurse Marilyn we got a hold of. She went through a list of symptoms.

Soaking a pad - almost.

Cramping - no.

Did you save the clot (dang, I had thought about that) - no.

Headed to ER - yes.

She advised me to wait and see. Since I was not cramping, she was very optimistic and thought the clot was possibly the sac from the second embryo (the twin) or a collection of blood that had to make it's way out. 

Reluctantly, I agreed and we turned back home. 

I love our nurse Marilyn. My favorite thing is that we share the same faith (LDS, Mormon). She not only gave me medical advice, but she gave me some spiritual guidance too. She reminded me that I needed to have some faith in this pregnancy, in my body and in my Heavenly Father. She recommended we just wait and see. If I start cramping or if more blood (run down your leg type of blood) happens, to then head to ER. Otherwise, she did not want a ER doc placing a speculum inside and cause more disruption. She said to come to the office at 8am for an ultrasound.

I am so glad we listened. 

I was in bed the rest of the night. Penny never left my side. Jason got dinner and checked on every bathroom trip. I am a lucky girl to have two people love me so much.

the look on her face when I would cry

laying across my legs

This is the 3rd Sunday I have had bleeding. Obviously, my faith is being tested. Jason keeps reminding me that I need to be more positive and have more faith. I think my faith is most lacking in myself, my body. I know that my Heavenly Father is hearing each and every prayer. I have faith in that. I lack in knowing that I can do this and I will get through this - whatever the result.

I have to have faith.

(And I have to relax!)

"I bear witness of the power of the priesthood given to the Church to protect us and guide us. And because we have that, we have no fear of the future. Fear is the opposite of faith. We move forward, certain that the Lord will watch over us, particularly in the family."

-Elder Boyd K. Packer