If you look closely, I updated the title image of our blog. Our address, for now, will stay the same. We are still unsure of our blog's future. For now, we are living each and every day GRATEFUL and HOPEFUL that we are STILL PREGNANT.
Showing posts with label Haylee and Molly. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Haylee and Molly. Show all posts
Sunday, May 27, 2012
Monday, December 12, 2011
To our family, friends & readers: Haylee
Since the blog launch Molly & I have noticed when we are talking to people and their kid(s) come up 2 things are happening….
1. If they are bitching about their maniac of a child they are quick look at us and stop.
2. If they are raving about how amazing their kid(s) are, yes, that’s right they see us and stop.
What we want you to know is that it is OK to bitch and rave about your kid(s) in our presence. We welcome it all, the good, the bad and the ugly. Just because you know we are dealing with infertility issues now, closing us out of your life with your children only takes us both back to square one when only a few people knew about our issues with getting pregnant. So again, we feel shut out. Talk to us about whatever! Not to mention you lovely ladies with kids WILL be the people we reach out to when our future punk rocker(s) are acting up! haha
I cannot leave out my pity party this weekend… Being restricted from some of the things I love for the next 2 weeks is really hard for me. It makes me pissy. I think about most “normal” chicks that are able to just get pregnant & the fact they have these 2 weeks (and in many cases more than these 2 weeks) to still play. So, yes, I don’t think it is fair that I have to ACT like I am pregnant but have ZERO idea. For me it is like driving a car with a blindfold on (sounds fun, right? HA!).
Here are just a couple examples from the weekend:
My husband went snowboarding on Saturday and I got so cranky. Not at him (he did a wonderful job taking care of me this weekend), but just the pity party thing. I love snowboarding, I wanted to go too! When I ordered my DECAF Skinny Vanilla Latte I got all grumpy again (good news though, it was still really delish).
Then I said to myself “why are you having this pity party you idiot” (and I know I am not the only crazy person reading that has full on conversations in her head!).
But then I thought again. It is also OK for me to have a pity party every now and again and for no one to judge me or cast stones given my situation. Trust me I am grateful, but this process and the not knowing is so very hard given our track record with unexplained infertility. I am a need to know NOW type girl, not in 2 weeks.
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| They are both little angels & devils! |
1. If they are bitching about their maniac of a child they are quick look at us and stop.
2. If they are raving about how amazing their kid(s) are, yes, that’s right they see us and stop.
What we want you to know is that it is OK to bitch and rave about your kid(s) in our presence. We welcome it all, the good, the bad and the ugly. Just because you know we are dealing with infertility issues now, closing us out of your life with your children only takes us both back to square one when only a few people knew about our issues with getting pregnant. So again, we feel shut out. Talk to us about whatever! Not to mention you lovely ladies with kids WILL be the people we reach out to when our future punk rocker(s) are acting up! haha
I cannot leave out my pity party this weekend… Being restricted from some of the things I love for the next 2 weeks is really hard for me. It makes me pissy. I think about most “normal” chicks that are able to just get pregnant & the fact they have these 2 weeks (and in many cases more than these 2 weeks) to still play. So, yes, I don’t think it is fair that I have to ACT like I am pregnant but have ZERO idea. For me it is like driving a car with a blindfold on (sounds fun, right? HA!).
Here are just a couple examples from the weekend:
My husband went snowboarding on Saturday and I got so cranky. Not at him (he did a wonderful job taking care of me this weekend), but just the pity party thing. I love snowboarding, I wanted to go too! When I ordered my DECAF Skinny Vanilla Latte I got all grumpy again (good news though, it was still really delish).
Then I said to myself “why are you having this pity party you idiot” (and I know I am not the only crazy person reading that has full on conversations in her head!).
But then I thought again. It is also OK for me to have a pity party every now and again and for no one to judge me or cast stones given my situation. Trust me I am grateful, but this process and the not knowing is so very hard given our track record with unexplained infertility. I am a need to know NOW type girl, not in 2 weeks.
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
DISCLAIMER - We are not special- Love H & M
Before we go any further with this crazy blog, we wanted to point out one thing.
Haylee- I have never felt special I just felt cursed because I waited until later in life to get married, because we waited to start trying, because I focused on my career, because damnit, I wanted to have some fun….. because, because, because... you get it.
When I met Molly and found out her infertility “secret” I thought "how can I tell her anything that I am going through"?? I mean come on. She has been pregnant (3 times!!), she has gone through so much more than I can even imagine. So, for awhile I was hesitant about how much I told her and how much I talked when she asked me questions. I was quick to switch the subject back to her. As our friendship grew it just became second nature to put it all out there. It wasn’t about whose story was worse or how much time has been spent. It is about no matter where you are in your journey to have a baby, each of us has something amazing to share. Whether you are at step one of fertility testing or going on 10 years of issues, our hearts go out to all of you dealing with any type of baby making issues. Unless of course you are on crack. You already know how I feel about the fertile crackhead population.....
Molly- Reading Haylee's thoughts makes me love and appreciate her even more. Amidst what she was going through, her private battle, she was worried about me. She wanted to see me succeed. To turn it all around, my thoughts when I first met and spoke with her were, "at least I know I can get pregnant. How hard must it be to live in a world of unknown." I felt she deserved the success of a pregnancy more to get her the relief that her body would overcome and that the steps she had taken were not in vain. In yoga we preach constantly that "it's not about the destination, but the journey". This journey is never the same for anyone. There is no black and white, just pools and pools of gray.
Anyone who is in the crazy infertility boat with us knows that we each have to find our way to get there. For some, it will be longer, harder, more expensive and more emotional. For others, it might be the flip of a switch. One person is not more special than the other. We are just different. But it is up to us to see those differences and to support them. To be there as a shoulder to cry on, an ear to listen and some arms to hug. To want and have a child is a divine and righteous desire. And we want, I want, everyone who has this desire to succeed. To be given this chance. My journey might take a while. And it's time I accept that.
WE ARE NOT SPECIAL.
Our stories, our "issues". They are not special. Our feelings and our frustrations, they too, are not special. But we are different. We are unlike others.
The feedback we have received has been tremendous. There has been so much love and support. There has been genuine hope for our successes. We are truly grateful for the open hearts our blog has been received with. Each story, comment and thumbs up means so much to us and it will help us continue this crazy, irrational journey.
When I met Molly and found out her infertility “secret” I thought "how can I tell her anything that I am going through"?? I mean come on. She has been pregnant (3 times!!), she has gone through so much more than I can even imagine. So, for awhile I was hesitant about how much I told her and how much I talked when she asked me questions. I was quick to switch the subject back to her. As our friendship grew it just became second nature to put it all out there. It wasn’t about whose story was worse or how much time has been spent. It is about no matter where you are in your journey to have a baby, each of us has something amazing to share. Whether you are at step one of fertility testing or going on 10 years of issues, our hearts go out to all of you dealing with any type of baby making issues. Unless of course you are on crack. You already know how I feel about the fertile crackhead population.....
Molly- Reading Haylee's thoughts makes me love and appreciate her even more. Amidst what she was going through, her private battle, she was worried about me. She wanted to see me succeed. To turn it all around, my thoughts when I first met and spoke with her were, "at least I know I can get pregnant. How hard must it be to live in a world of unknown." I felt she deserved the success of a pregnancy more to get her the relief that her body would overcome and that the steps she had taken were not in vain. In yoga we preach constantly that "it's not about the destination, but the journey". This journey is never the same for anyone. There is no black and white, just pools and pools of gray.
Anyone who is in the crazy infertility boat with us knows that we each have to find our way to get there. For some, it will be longer, harder, more expensive and more emotional. For others, it might be the flip of a switch. One person is not more special than the other. We are just different. But it is up to us to see those differences and to support them. To be there as a shoulder to cry on, an ear to listen and some arms to hug. To want and have a child is a divine and righteous desire. And we want, I want, everyone who has this desire to succeed. To be given this chance. My journey might take a while. And it's time I accept that.
We are not special. And we are okay with that.
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