Waiting On A Miracle (Monday) - Molly

i really hope it is

Here I go again, crazy time. Maybe it is the impending ultrasounds (TOMORROW), maybe my body is trying to tell me something. Maybe I am overreacting, but I can't stop.

After my scare last weekend, I have been really good about taking "time" during my day to just lay down (and napped I did). Then on Wednesday (6 weeks exactly) I got really excited when the nausea set in. Oh how I loved that feeling! 

Back up. Let me date this out - it really started last Monday, but it was slight. It was Wednesday when my appetite was directly affected. Thursday gave some relief, but only until the evening time (acupuncture helped me out). But as of Friday and Saturday, I feel sort of like myself, I'm barely nauseous and my afternoon naps aren't so dreamy.

Let me also add that I woke up with more bleeding on Thursday morning. I did not call the doctor because it was brown and watery and it seemed more residual of Sunday's bleed and nothing new. No cramps, no pains, but I am still freaked out.
I should have called.

 I feel "not like myself", but I also don't feel like I did earlier this week.

So what do I do? I feel so nervous, so unsure. Why the sudden relief? Is something happening? Did something happen? Is this pregnancy over? Is that why my symptoms are fading? I hate that I have ZERO confidence.

I feel that I am preparing for the worst, and not expecting the best.

 I am not cramping and not bleeding. My chest is slightly tender, just nothing like it was. I am still peeing often, but I am also drinking a lot of water. 

I am just wondering why did I have 3 days of nausea and then - poof! - it's over.

Monday can't come fast enough.

Until then, praying for nausea and fatigue. 

(who does that!) 

and I have got to get off the internet........