My dad is in town.
Today I got him all to myself.
And since I am limited in my activities, we just enjoyed the day together - it was nice.
It's no surprise that I ADORE my dad.
In fact, A LOT of people ADORE my dad.
He's just one of those people that you flock towards.
Today at lunch we were talking and he reminded me of a story from when I was little.
My dad is southern and refers to all women (to their face) as "darling", "honey", "sweetheart" etc.
But he refers to my mother (who I also ADORE,) as "mama" or "mother".
He has always done this.
When I was little I grew a bit concerned always hearing him refer to other women with those terms of endearment, but yet my mother (the love of his life) was "mother"?
And I remember EXACTLY what he said to me when I explained to him that I was concerned/perplexed.
He said, "The term mother or mama is the greatest term of endearment I could ever say. It is the greatest title or job you could ever have. There is no one more important to anyone than their mother (mama). And you mother is that to me."
My father does ADORE my mother over anyone else.
They are M.F.E.O.
(made for each other - does anyone else love Sleepless in Seattle?)
Today as I listened to that story, it began to sum up the past 5 years of my life.
Mother is the most endearing name/title that one could ever be given.
To be some one's mama is an honor, a gift, a blessing.
And it's what I want more than anything.
This is what we are working so hard for.
This is the one job, title, position - that I covet.
Someone recently asked me if I had to give physical birth to be considered a mother.
The answer is NO.
There is a but...
I am also not sure how far I will go to capture this title.
I turn 35 this year, my husband 39.
We still have 2 frozen embryos to "do something" with.
There are no guarantees with any option.
And all the options are pricey.
The longer this journey gets, the harder it is to keep moving forward.
Eventually, I have to give in.
And giving in, might be relinquishing this coveted role/title and possibly discovering it in some other way/form.
I don't know what our post IVF plans are.
There are so many small steps in between.
Nothing is off the table.
For now, we are focusing on the present and our "possible pearl".
We will figure out the rest...when it is time.
So, if you have been honored to be some one's mother or mama, please remember what a privilege, honor, blessing and gift it really is.
And it is because of how hard the job really is that makes it the greatest term of endearment.
So if your day was filled with tantrums, tears, poops, pee, spit, throw up, sticky fingers, snotty noses, smiles, giggles, hugs and kisses....
if someone was calling you "mama" or "mother" throughout it all....
you have truly been blessed.